update

ok, so...life hasn't been easy. watching someone slowly die is horrible. my grandma is soo sick. she doesn't have much time left. she rambles about stuff and makes no sense. i stayed there last night and she woke me up a lot. she woke me up at 6 am yelling because she said she needed water...but i think it was just because she wanted to make sure someone was there. its so crazy. she wants me to stay there everynight, though i am not sure if i will. it is a scarey thought to think i could be there alone with her when she dies. the faither healer was in tehre yesterday...that was interesting. just please pray for me and for my family. i am terrified to be there alone with her, but i have to if they need me, because i couldn't possibly be more affraid of wathcing her die than she is of dying. i am so stressed out, and i can't even imagine what its goign to be like when she goes...its just...not cool to think about even though i woudl rather her go soon because she is in a lot of pain, she isn't with it, she can bearly swallow, and she doens't have bowel movements anymore. i know GOD IS IN CONTROL. but im still scared...so please pray for me, and for my family that is going to be completely devestated when she goes, especailly for my grandpa because he has leukemia, and although he looks great and all they don't know what to do with him so pleade pray for more treatments and that he can make it through her death. ach that sucks to even say. just please pray a lot.

on a bright note, i have been reading "the hiding place" by corrie tenboom, and i woudl reccomend it to EVERYONE. its amazing, just absolutely amazing. thank you all for everything(hugs)