blogs, death, growth, a song and a poem.

why does this rarely let me blog? why does it tell me i have to switch to google...then not let me? how do i do whatever it wants me to do? please someone...help!

so, my uncle died. heart attack. 53 years old. on my moms side of course... very difficult to deal with all these deaths..please keep praying for us.

i've been reading my Bible every day for the past week. i've also been having a lot of conversations with people...seemingly random and what once i would have considered normal...but now i see God is helping me to get back on track. i find it very interesting the people God chooses to help me, people i didnt know until a week ago, people i've never talked to about these things amd people i said id never trust again. God rips down walls and He builds bridges and the things we dont even know could happen, happen. when we are in our weakest darkest moment, there He is to pull us up even when we think we might like to stay down. praise the LORD and give thanks for everything and everyone He gives you. and if you love someone, you should prolly tell them. you never know when the last time you see them or talk to them is going to be.



Almost heaven, West Virginia
Blue Ridge Mountains, Shenandoah River
Life is old there, older than the trees
Younger than the mountains, blowing like a breeze

Country roads, take me home
To the place, I belong
West Virginia, Mountain Mama
Take me home, country roads

All my memories gathered round her
Miners lady, stranger to blue water
Dark and dusty, painted on the sky
Misty taste of moonshine
Teardrop in my eye

Country roads, take me home
To the place, I belong
West Virginia, Mountain Mama
Take me home, country roads

I hear her voice
In the mornin hour she calls me
The radio reminds me of my home far away
And drivin down the road I get a feelinThat I should have been home yesterday, yesterday

Country roads, take me home
To the place, I belong
West Virginia, Mountain Mama
Take me home, country roads

Country roads, take me home
To the place, I belong
West Virginia, Mountain Mama
Take me home, country roads
Take me home, down country roads
Take me home, down counrty roads

- john denver

i remember life when life was more fun than sad. partties, and music, good food and laughs. i remember when she baked me cakes on my birthday and he read on Christmas eve. i remember the santa suit, and i remember raking leaves. i remember boxing day, and playing baseball, i remember the sweet maple smells in fall. i remember all those flamingos, and i remember backyard snow. i remember costumes and i remember jokes. i remember feelings and i remember words you spoke. i remember sitting on the back deck, and out front on hot days. i remember being carefree, like youd be there always. i remember when i heard the news...then heard the news again. knowing you were going to go, but not knowing when. i remember sitting with him, in the hospital waiting for him to get well. i remember sitting by the phone hearing that she fell. i remember each homecomming, hoping it was the last. i remember sitting there with her as each day and night went past. i remember the exhaustion, the worry and the fear. i remember the knowing...soon she wont be here. i remember being there when her suffering was no more. but mourning and crying there was no time for. i remember trying hard to keep myself germ free. i remember holding my breath and saying this cant be. i remember when he died, we begged him not to go. but his time had come and he left us all alone. i remember crying, cuz the tears dont really stop. i remember cryign cuz the tears dont really stop.

ill probably revise this a lot.

over so quickly..its so final.

grandpa died last night. it sucked worse than i ever could have imagined. i want him back. peay for us...a lot cuz we are all shocked and soo sad. hes really gone.... the visitation is tuesday at 1 pm until 2 pm, then the little service then back to his house for a party...though now that they are both gone..it is so different. i havent slept in a really long time...i went to my brothers hockey game tonight...he got a hattrick...for grandpa.